Wednesday, May 20, 2009

Absolutes

These are few things that I can rely on:

1. If I start making my bed, my daughter is going to come running from wherever she has been hiding and start jumping on it...always out of reach.

2. If I am making an important phone call, someone is going to start fighting or crying....loudly.

3. If we are in a hurry, a shoe is going to be lost.

4. If there is a filthy word on my movie or tv show, my daughters will walk in at that moment.

5. If Big C is feeling amorous, my children are feeling clingy. They can even be at the neighbors and some sort of radar ticks on. I just know they are thinking, "Something is not quite right....I need to go home! NOW! I need to find Mommy and Papa and stop whatever they are doing! NOW!" They will then come running into the house, breathless and searching.....it is very annoying to say the least. Instead of radar, we call it sexdar. I know....TMI!

6. If I run into an old friend or distant family member, I have one of three things:
* Something dark and nasty caught in my front teeth.
* Lipstick smeared all over my teeth.
* A boogie swinging out of my nose to say "hello".

Just a few joys in my life. Do you have any that you would like to add to the list?

6 comments:

Dellp said...

I think that it can all be summed up into one well-known phrase--"Murphy's Law."

Welcome to my world.

:oP

Amberly said...

Great post! All of these are absolute truths!!!

2busy said...

I have totally had all of the above happen to me. I believe it is just the life of a parent. We must accept our fate...

Sarah Nanine said...

FYI #6 did not happen at all when we ran into each other at Winco.

Thanks for the laugh and yes pretty much all of those things happen to me too, well except Big C feeling amorous towards me.

Danya said...

Here's your solution: stop making your bed, don't make your kids wear shoes, stop having sex with your husband, and compeletly ignore everyone you see at the store. Works for me!

stoner said...

Danya...you kill me! I needed a good laugh! Actually, your solution is very practical and wise. I will take it under advisement! :D